Drunk Girls Look For Keys In Boston Harbor Under Atlantic Beer Garden

(This video is way too long & boring. Skip through parts & then watch @ 9:24 for a slip n fall)

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Two drunk girls looking for keys in cold-jellyfish-filled water in South Boston, MA, underneath a restaurant.

A.B. Swimming in Boston Harbor is on my anti-bucket list. I wouldn’t set a single foot in that “water” for anything under $5,000. The amount of chemical waste, human feces, decaying corpses, trash, boat gas and oil in that water is horrifying. The type of sludge that gives fish 3 eyes and oysters red tide. “I love that dirty water,” isn’t supposed to be taken literally – blacked out or not. And the song is called Dirty Water for a reason.

I don’t care if those are keys to Kate Upton’s hotel suite. Radioactive “water” is never worth it. Especially when you need to climb barefoot into the annals of the Atlantic Beer Garden onto some slippery ass rocks. I guess when Tough Mudder is in town everyone is a bad ass. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you when your kids are born with 8 fingers and a Jay Leno sized head.

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About the author

Shred Kennedy lives in South Boston and enjoys candlelight dinners and long walks on the beach.

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